This blog is inspired by Prakhar Gupta’s insightful video on his YouTube channel Prakhar Ke Pravachan. If you haven’t explored his content yet, I highly recommend it — it’s thought-provoking and practical.
Your 20s can feel overwhelming, with endless options and societal pressures pulling you in different directions. But here’s the good news: confusion in your 20s is normal, even healthy. In this blog, we’ll explore:
- Why you feel confused in your 20s.
- A practical framework to navigate through the confusion.
- A secret sauce to embrace life’s uncertainties.
Why are you confused?
Many of us are trapped in what can be called the assembly line model of reality. This concept dates back to the industrial era when systems were designed to produce factory workers. Today, it manifests as a rigid life script:
Education → Graduation → Job → Marriage → Family → Promotion → Retirement → DeathLook around, and you’ll see most people unknowingly following this model. Why? Because it feels safe and familiar. Breaking out of this loop means questioning the norm, and that can be uncomfortable.
But here’s the twist:
The discomfort of questioning the norm is a good thing.
It’s a sign of growth. Yes, it might lead to overthinking or self-doubt, but as the saying goes:“Bad positions lead to great positions later.”
Instead of rushing to conform to societal expectations, give yourself the permission to explore your questions. Confusion, or a quarter-life crisis, is a sign that you’re searching for something meaningful.
“Don’t fall for the pressure to figure it all out without knowing what you truly want.”
A Framework to Solve the Problem
When life feels confusing, the key is to approach it differently. Instead of viewing life as a chaotic mess, think of it as a game.
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Life is the Main Game.
Your career, purpose, or long-term goals represent the main game. -
Habits are the Everyday Game.
The daily actions you take—your routines and habits—form the foundation of success in the main game.Imagine an iceberg: the success you see above the surface (main game) is built on the solid base of consistent efforts (everyday game).
“If you want to win your main game, you must first master your everyday game.”
How to Master Your Everyday Game
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Visualize Your Heaven and Hell: Write down your dream life (heaven) and your worst possible life (hell). Identify which habits pull you closer to heaven and which drag you toward hell.
For example, smoking may seem cool now, but can lead to health issues (hell). Quit it. -
Make intentional choices daily: Ask yourself—Is this action moving me closer to my heaven or my hell?
How to Identify Your Main Game
If you don’t know what your ultimate goal is, don’t worry. Try this exercise:
- Take a piece of paper and divide it into three columns.
- Write down five items in each column.
- Look for overlaps:
- If an item appears in all three columns, it’s a top priority.
- In two columns, it’s important but secondary.
- The rest can wait.
Then, dedicate two weeks to explore each priority. Dive deep, immerse yourself. By the end of the experiment, you’ll have clearer insight into what resonates with you.
Finally, seek a mentor. A good mentor acts as a guide, helping you fast-track your journey and avoid unnecessary mistakes.
Sher Point
“In most of life, we make choices with incomplete information.”
Whether it’s choosing a career, a relationship, or a major life decision, you’ll rarely feel 100% ready. And that’s okay. Freedom comes from accepting this uncertainty and taking action anyway.
To thrive, focus on mastering one skill. Become exceptionally good at it. When you excel at something, opportunities multiply, and life’s uncertainties feel less daunting.
TL;DR
- Master Your Everyday Game: Build habits that align with your goals.
- Discover Your Main Game: Use the framework to explore and prioritize your interests.
- Take Risks: Embrace challenges, even with incomplete information.
- Find a Mentor: Learn from someone who’s already succeeded in your desired path.
- Embrace Uncertainty: Trust yourself to grow through the unknown.